Funny Whatsapp Messages – Messages (WhatsApp, SMS) – Android Apps on Google Play – Funny statuses for your Whatsapp posts
If life gives you lemons, throw them at some one!
Excuse me, do u have a Band-Aid?
I am stranded on toilet island
Don’t drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.
Don’t piss me off! I’m running out of places to hide the bodies.
Double your drive space. Delete Windows!
I’m not high maintenance. I am just a precious cargo with lavish instruction for upkeep.
There’s this lost cause I believe is called myself
Math and alcohol don’t mix. Please don’t drink and drive
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
Statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate.
Statistically 5/4 of people have trouble with fractions.
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
My friend recently explained to me why he refuses to get to married. He says “the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs… ..”
When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?
I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
I’m right 90% of the time, so why worry about the other 3%?
Why do people use away messages, they’re so stupid!
I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect!
Love is going to bed early.Marriage is going to sleep early.
Tv has no place in love.Marriage is a fight for remote control.
Smart people like me don’t use away messages… I am so smart!
I’ll be back before you can pronounce actillimandataquerin altosapaoyabayadoondib!
I wish I were you so I could be friends with me.
A day without sunshine is like, night.
Always try to be modest and be proud of it!
WARNING: Objects in mirror are fatter than they appear.